Friday, November 14, 2008

Girls' guide Part 2 - Sex & the Stadium

There's lots of different positions in football and every girl knows Sex & the City. So it only makes sense to use the characters of Sex & the City as my main reference here. I'll use other pop culture references too but you'll get it!

Offensive positions
Quarterback (QB) - This position is like Carrie. There'd be no show without her. The QB's job is to basically be the leader of the offensive. They have control of the ball. Much like how Carrie controls the show because episodes are generally based on whatever she's writing about. The QB can throw the ball, hand it off, or run with it in order to gain yards. Real life QB you'd know - Tony Romo; how you know him - he's Jessica Simpson's boyfriend.

Wide receiver (WR) - This position is like Samantha. The wide receiver is meant to catch passes from the QB. Samantha is a self-proclaimed receiver. Also, WRs often like to go for the deep ball (a pass far down the field). Samantha also likes to go de...ok you get the picture. WRs tend to be the primadonna of the team as well for some reason. Everything has to be all about them, which is very Samantha-like. Real life WR you'd know - Jerry Rice (he's retired though); how you know him - he danced with the stars.

Running back (RB) - This position is like Charlotte really only because she runs. RBs are the runners on the team. When they are involved in a play, the QB will either hand them the ball or throw a short pass to them. Real life RB you'd know - O.J. Simpson (retired); how you know him - ...moving on

Tight end (TE) - I know you're all thinking this position is like Smith because of the name but there's more to the TE than a...tight end... The TE has 2 main functions: receiving and blocking. So in reality, I guess the Smith comparison works. He gets the spotlight when he's receiving all the attention (like catching the ball), but he also would do anything for Samantha and help her with anything (like blocking the defenders for the WR or RB to make a play) Real life TE you'd know - Mike Ditka (retired); how you know him - he was in Kicking and Screaming with Will Ferrell

Offensive line (OL) - The offense line consists of different positions but we'll just group them together for simplicity right now. These guys are like Miranda. Their build is Miranda when she's pregnant. Their job is to protect the QB by blocking defenders. Miranda is always known for protecting and being there for Carrie (the QB). They line up at the line of scrimmage (where the ball is placed). In other terms, they are the bodyguards. Real life lineman you'd know - John Madden (retired); how you know him - Frank Caliendo impersonates him (really well). He was also in Little Giants.

Kicker (K) - The kicker is like Big. He either is the most loved or most hated guy on the show, much like a kicker to a team. When a kicker makes a field goal, he's loved. So when Big does something sweet and amazing for Carrie (like the last episode of the series in Paris), he's loved. When a kicker misses a field goal and the team loses, it's left on his shoulders. So when Big screws things up (i.e. marries Natasha), everyone hates him. Real life kicker you'd know - Jay Feely; how you know him - Dane Cook made fun of him on an SNL skit.

Next part we'll do defensive positions!


Daryl said...

You are insane. Informative as shit, but crazy. :)

Me-Me King said...

Delightful! As a fan of both football and Sex in the City - I get it!