Monday, December 29, 2008

Week 17 Recap

Well boys and girls, we've now made it through another season of the NFL. Bring on the playoffs! Here's what happened this week:

Rams @ Falcons - The Falcons came out on top in this shoot out in Atlanta. Despite having the ball 11 mins less and having 3 turnovers, the Falcons finish 11-5 on the season and 2nd in the NFC South. Michael Turner and Stephen Jackson lit up the running game for both teams. Turner had 208 yds and 1 TD and Jackson had 161 yds and 2 TDs. Great fantasy stats for anyone in their championship week.

Patriots @ Bills - The wind was the biggest factor in this game. At one point, they actually had to fix the goal posts because the wind had caused them to lean. Tough elements for throwing caused both offenses to utilize their running games. The Patriots ran the ball 47 times while Cassel only had 8 pass attempts. The wind was so strange that both missed field goals were wide right (at opposite ends of the stadium). The Pats came out with a 13-0 victory over the Bills and had to watch the Jets/Fins and Jags/Ravens games to find out their playoff destiny.

Chiefs @ Bengals - I think Marvin Lewis decided that he wanted to keep his job in Cincinnati and a late season surge might help him keep it. The Bengals won their last 3 games after starting the season 1-11-1. Herm Edwards led his Chiefs to a 2-14 record this year. Are both coaches on the chopping block?

Bears @ Texans - The Bears needed a win and a Vikings loss to make it to the playoffs. They didn't get either. The Texans made a late season surge finishing 4-1 in their last 5 which coincides with the return of Matt Schaub. The Texans ripped apart the Bears defense with 455 offensive yds. Maybe the Bears are going to need to rethink their defense's ability and stop saying that that's the best part of their game.

Giants @ Vikings - It was a day of rest for the Giants but they still gave the Vikings a game of it while the Vikings fought for the NFC North title. The aptly named Ryan Longwell kicked a 50 yd field goal with 5 seconds left to send the Vikings to the playoffs as the number 3 seed.

Panthers @ Saints - The Panthers needed to win this game to win the NFC South and get the number 2 seed for the playoffs. After 3 quarters, it looked like it was going to be a walk in the park for Carolina. Until the Saints decided at the beginning of the 4th quarter that they were going to play. After scoring 21 points in the 4th, the Saints took the lead 31-30. Panthers kicker John Kasey kicked a field goal with 3 mins left in the game to take the lead back 33-31 and secure the win. Noteworthy: Brees just missed Dan Marino's passing record by 16 yds for the season.

Browns @ Steelers - Good God the Browns are just brutal. Roethlisberger suffered a concussion and had to be carted off the field and the Steelers still took it to the Browns 31-0. Phil Dawson missed a 53 yd field goal which would have been the Browns only source of points. I'm disappointed Phil; I even made you a poster.

Ready for the mass firings in Cleveland. GM Phil Savage and Coach Romeo Crennel are gone today after a 4-12 season. But really all I care about is if Brady Quinn will be starting next season or not.

Raiders @ Bucs - Um wtf Tampa Bay? I think that's the question most people are asking. Did you start the Christmas partying too early? Like maybe for the entire month of December. 0-4 this month means no playoffs for you. A win and you could have been in the playoffs! Idiots!

Titans @ Colts - Both teams rested starters, but as suspected Manning came out to get the yards he needed to have his 9th season with 4000 passing yards. MVP - can't you hear it? :) The Colts backups dominated the Titans backups led by original starter Vince Young.

Lions @ Packers - Oh Lions. Congratulations on history! First team ever to go 0-16. Marinelli's fired. Who's next?

Jaguars @ Ravens - A Ravens win puts them in the playoffs. They dominated the Jags 27-7 and clinch the number 6 seed for the playoffs.

Seahawks @ Cardinals - The Cards decided to actually show up this week and show why they're in the playoffs. Despite having 100 penalty yards, less time of possession and 2 turnovers, their 457 offensive yards and 34 points showed that maybe they do look like a playoff team. Although, I see them getting knocked out week 1.

Redskins @ 49ers - The 9ers squeeked out a win as time expired to finish 4-1 in their last 5 games. The 49ers have confirmed that Singletary will be back as head coach next year. And as for the Redskins, although Jim Zorn claimed to be "the worst coach in the NFL" his team finishes at 500 for the year in one of the toughest divisions.

Jets @ Dolphins - Fins win and they're in the playoffs. Fins lose and the Pats are in. Jets win and they don't look stupid for the Favre/Pennington thing. Fins win and Pennington gets to stick his tongue out at them. So many story lines! I loved watching Favre throw 3 INTs while Chad threw 2 TDs. It was a beautiful moment haha. Anyway Miami is in the playoffs after finishing 1-15 last season. They finish 11-5 this year. Oh and Mangini is looking for a new job after being fired as head coach of the Jets.

Cowboys @ Eagles - After the Bucs loss earlier in the day, all eyes in the NFC went to this game as the winner gets the 6 seed in the playoffs. Apparently the Cowboys didn't get this memo. 44-6. That's all I have to say. Look for the Eagles to upset the Vikes 1st round and look for a mass firing in Dallas.

Broncos @ Chargers - I hate the West. That's all. Ok but really, did the Broncos know this was basically a playoff game for them? 52-21? BRUTAL! All I have to say is San Diego you're going down next week ;)

Playoffs next week!

Monday, December 22, 2008

Week 16 Recap

Colts @ Jaguars - In continuing to prove that he should be MVP this year, Peyton led the Colts to a 31-24 victory completing 29 of 34 passes for 396 yds and 3 TDs. The Colts' 4th quarter comeback wrapped up the 5th seed in the playoffs, while the Jaguars fell to an abmysal 5-10 for the season.

Ravens @ Cowboys - Goodbye Texas Stadium; thanks for the memories, but Cowboy fans will definitely want to forget this game. The game was fairly boring until a very crazy, very exciting 4th quarter. Each time Dallas looked like they were coming back, the Ravens' running backs had a response. And what a response it was! First, McGahee for 77yds and then McClain for 82 yds. The win keeps the Ravens in for the 2nd wild card spot and shockingly the Cowboys got the help they needed to keep them in line for a wild card spot too.

Bengals @ Browns - Yawn. What a boring battle of Ohio. The Browns' 3rd string QB Dorsey played so poorly ( injured. Is it just me or are the QBs in Cleveland getting purposely injured?) that 4th string QB Bruce Gradkowski came in for an INT, a sack and an 8.3 rating. Awesome Browns...awesome! Anyway the Bengals won...not that it matters.

Saints @ 0-16 ...I mean Lions - 42-7. The Saints offense spread the love around with the fantasy points. 2 TDs for Brees to Colston, and a TD each for Thomas, McAllister, Bell and Meachem. And ummm the Lions did stuff? Kevin Smith had a good game 111 yds and a TD. OMG! I think that's the first nice thing I've said about the Lions! I knew it could happen eventually.

Cardinals @ Patriots - In a game that meant nothing to the Cardinals and everything to the Patriots, both teams played exactly the way expected. The Cards decided the snow wasn't their cup of tee. The Patriots decided making snow angels would be a great way to celebrate a touchdown. The Pats hang on to AFC East title hopes.

Steelers @ Titans - In game 1 of the battle for home field advantage, the Titans showed the Steelers what they were made of and the Steelers showed the Titans that Big Ben enjoys throwing INTs and getting sacked. The Steelers held in there until the 4th quarter but they just couldn't match the Titans.

49ers @ Rams - Oh NFC West, why oh why do you exist to torture us with terrible teams and terrible matchups? The 49ers squeaked out with a victory in game they shouldn't have won.

Dolphins @ Chiefs - The Chiefs gave the Dolphins quite the battle to keep their playoff dreams alive. The two teams combined for nearly 900 offensive yards. The Dolphins finally took the lead in this shootout with 4 minutes left in the game and held on to stay in the hunt for January.

Chargers @ Bucs - Ok seriously? What the hell is going on? The Chargers crushed the Bucs. This win keeps in the running for the AFC West title (thanks to a Broncos loss explained later). For the Bucs, their playoff hopes need a lot of help when a few weeks ago they looked like a for sure.

Bills @ Broncos - Despite having nearly twice the amount of offensive yards, the Broncos dropped the ball (no pun intended) huge on this one. They had a chance to lock up the West and secure a playoff berth but instead they have to battle the Chargers in San Diego next Sunday night to find out how the West will be won.

Jets @ Seahawks - Brett Favre spent his career in Lambeau Field. He spent his career playing in a cold, frozen tundra!! So why did a little snow in Seattle shatter the Jets' playoff hopes? Now not only do they need to beat Miami next week but they need the Bills to take it to the Pats. The Dolphins are now looking to win the AFC East. How funny would that be to watch Chad Pennington lead the Dolphins who finished 1-15 to the playoffs with a victory over the Jets, his former team, next week?

Texans @ Raiders - The problem with week 16 matchups is a lot of them don't matter. This falls into that category. The Raiders beat the Texans to "improve" to 4-11 while the Texans failed yet again to have a winning record at 7-8.

Falcons @ Vikings - The Vikings had more yards, longer time of possession, less penalty yards, more passing yards, more rushing yards, etc. So why did the Falcons win? Simple...they didn't rub their hands with butter before the game. The Vikes lost 4 of 7 fumbles. The Falcons are proud owners of a playoff berth while the Vikes are praying for a Bears loss tonight with the North still open.

Eagles @ Redskins - The Cowboys lost. The Bucs lost. Are the Eagles going to step up and move in for the wild card spot? Nope. At least next week's games are going to be exciting to see who wants to go to the playoffs. Because by the way the contenders played this week, it seems like no one wants to.

Panthers @ Giants - Game 2 of the battle of home field advantage and what a battle it was. The running backs showed that they are kings of the field. The Giants backs combined for over 300 yards (over 200 alone for Ward) and Panther Williams had 4 rushing TDs. The game went to OT and set up a great preview of the potential NFC championship game. The Giants came out with the win and the number 1 seed for the playoffs.

Tonight we've got Packers @ Bears. The Bears need to win this one to keep their playoff hopes alive but the Pack would love nothing more than to crush that dream at Soldier Field. Should be a good one.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Girls' guide part 4 - Dear Vince Lombardi trophy, will you be mine?

Ok ladies, it's been awhile since I've written a post for you, so here's one for the girls.

Super Bowl Sunday is one of the most important days on the sports calendar. The parties, the work pools, the beer, the wings, the pizza, the half-time show, and oh yeah...the game! So what day on a woman's calendar would this compare to? The answer is simple Valentine's Day.

Now I know you're thinking, "What?!?! You're comparing the Hallmark romance holiday to the biggest day in sports??" But think about it.

Hype! Both days are so hyped up and the hype can build up unrealistic expectations for the single and attached alike. Now that makes sense for Cupid, but how does that work for football? Well obviously, every season you want your team to be in the Super Bowl! However, with a salary cap and a competitive league, that's just not going to happen. So most years, you would be single for the Super Bowl and even if you are attached, there's a chance your team won't win (or plays uncharacteristically bad *cough last year's Patriots cough cough*).

So, let's say you're single (i.e. your team doesn't make it to the big show), you still care about the Super Bowl, just like you would still care about Valentine's Day if you're boy/girlfriendless. It's a bittersweet emotion. You're bummed that your team isn't there, but you're going to make the best of it and go to that party with your friends, just like how you'd have that girls' night with all your single girls.

Now, if your team does make it to the Super Bowl and wins, it's like having your perfect Valentine's Day with Prince Charming, champagne, romance, flowers, diamonds, etc.

So girls, when your boyfriend/husband/whatever, talks non-stop about how excited he is for the Super Bowl, understand this is his Valentine's Day. Don't get upset when your house gets bombarded by 10 men drinking beer and wiping chicken wing sauce off their face. It'd be like him getting upset at you for loving those diamond earrings he just bought you a little too much.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Week 15 Recap

Saints @ Bears - The Bears kept their playoff hopes alive by squeaking out a win in OT. Despite dominating in offensive yds and time of possession, the Saints lost, which could have been due to their 97 penalty yds and Drew Brees' inability to find his receivers instead of the Bears defense. Also, just to clear things up, Mike Carey let everyone know before the OT coin toss, that if there was not a winner after 15 mins, the game would end in a tie. Thanks Mike but I think the entire NFL league knows that now.

Bucs @ Falcons - Another OT game. Jeff Garcia didn't start for the Bucs, but they hung in there tying it up in the 4th to force OT. But as we know, you just can't beat an NFC South team at home and the Falcons K Jason Elam's game winning field goal continued to improve that stat.

Redskins @ Bengals - ....uhhh did I miss something? Did the Bengals miss the memo that they suck? Or do the Redskins really, really not want to go to the post-season? They're 1-5 for their last 6 games. When it became 17-0, I stopped paying attention and just started to wonder if Clinton Portis convinced the Redskins to all revolt against Jim Zorn.

Titans @ Texans - While the Bengals missed the memo of sucking, the Texans missed the memo of there's only 17 weeks, why become red-hot when you're already eliminated from playoff contention. Jeff Fisher gave the game to the Texans by opting to go for it on 4th&3 with 2 mins left instead of kicking a 49-yd field goal when being down by 1 pt. Please Coach Fisher, can you explain your rationale on that one?

Packers @ Jaguars - With this loss, the NFC North is now left up to the Vikings or the Bears. David Garrard actually played a great game with 238 yds and 2 TDs. I'm disappointed in the Packers though. They've lost 6 of their last 7 to put them at 5-9. With the Brett Favre drama during pre-season there, I really wanted the Packers to stick it to him and show him they didn't need him.

49ers @ Dolphins - The Dolphins put an end to ther 49ers destruction of the AFC East with a 14-9 victory. This win also keeps them in the race for the division title against the Jets and Patriots. The 9ers dominated in yards and t.o.p. but just couldn't make it to the endzone. Field goals just don't cut it.

Seahawks @ Rams - In a game that had absolutely no purpose, the Seahawks won. No one cares though so moving on.

Bills @ Jets - Oh J.P. Another week, another loss man. These jokes just never get old. The Bills had the lead with less than 2 mins left to go when Losman got sacked and fumbled the ball. The Jets returned that fumbled for a TD to ensure their win. My friends who are Pats fans (yes I know I'm friends with the enemy) were less than impressed with Jippy.

Chargers @ Chiefs - Uh huh...the Chargers keep their playoff hopes alive by improving to 6-8. I just threw up in my mouth a little by saying that. A late 4th quarter TD (with a missed 2 pt conversion) gave the Chargers a 1 pt win over the Chiefs. Man that division makes me want to gag. Might as well move the Bills to the west so they can all have fun losing together.

Lions @ Colts - La la la ooo look shiny light...moving on...Ok but seriously I think I went white when the Lions tied it. I was speechless. I was scared. The Colts couldn't possibly lose to the Lions. They smartened up and won 31-21 but seriously very disappointed in you boys for letting it get close with the worst team I've ever seen.

Vikings @ Cardinals - So all my friends fought with me on this one. Why are you picking the Vikings, woman?? Well let's see, the Cardinals coming into this game were 3-5 outside of their division. The Vikings need the win. The Cardinals already clinched. The Cardinals are overrated. Jackson needs to prove himself. And after 21-0 in the 1st, I knew the Vikings had this one in the bag.

Steelers @ Ravens - Once again, with the last minute magic, the Steelers steal this one from the Ravens to win the AFC North. The TD caused some controversy over its legitimacy but regardless, it counted and the Steelers won.

Broncos @ Panthers - Not shocking. The Panthers kicked some ass at home as expected. This win makes next week's matchup between the Panthers and Giants even more exciting seeing as whoever wins that gets homefield advantage for the playoffs. This win also improves the NFC South home team win-loss record to 26-2. Luckily, for the Giants, next week's game is in New York so maybe they have a shot.

Patriots @ Raiders - The Pats blew out the Raiders to the tune of 49-26, which keeps them in playoff contention with the tight race in the AFC East. Now sure their offense can put up points but their defense should be embarrassed giving up 26 pts to one of the worst scoring offenses in the league.

Giants @ Cowboys - Romo figured out how to solve the problem with his players. I'm just going to throw to EVERYONE! 9 players caught at least one catch on Sunday night's matchup. While Romo threw 2 TDs, little Manning threw 2 INTs. The Cowboys are eyeing the playoffs, while the Giants need to smarten up if they want the number 1 seed.

Browns @ Eagles - I was dragged to a party by a friend last night (yes a party on a Monday's Christmas time...don't judge) so I didn't get to see this game but the Eagles won 30-10. Also, Ken Dorsey really sucks so I think it'd be fun if Romeo lets Joshua Cribbs play QB for the next 2 weeks or just run a wildcat offense every play.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

T.O. will pick a fight anywhere he can

So Terrell Owens is doing what he does best again: bitching. Seriously T.O., you are the whiniest player in the NFL. Romo's ignoring you? Seriously? C'mon man (Keyshawn's rubbing off on me)! What happened to your little man love for Tony? Remember last season? You cried for him. Now you're picking a fight with yet another QB. I wouldn't throw to you either if I was Romo. Grow up T.O.; you're 35, act like it! And in case you forgot about T.O.'s crying fit, enjoy!

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Jeff Garcia loves to date...

...Hot quarterbacks?? Maybe there was some truth to T.O.'s madness.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Week 14 Recap

It's Monday you know what that means: I should be doing homework but of course I'm blogging instead. So what happened this weekend in football?

Raiders @ Chargers - Seeing as this was a rivalry game, you think the Raiders would have elected to show up. Apparently, they didn't think so. It was UGLY! The Chargers played more like the Chargers everyone expected all season but when you consider who they were playing, it wasn't all that impressive. Also, what a terrible matchup for a prime time game. The NFL has been disappointing with their schedule making this season!

Jaguars @ Bears - This one was over on the Jaguars opening drive when Garrard threw an INT which the Bears turned into a TD a few plays later. This win keeps the Bears in playoff contention one game back of the Vikings. The Jags have dropped 4 in a row and now sit at the bottom of the AFC South.

Vikings @ Lions - Gus Frerotte left the game and the Vikings offense was left up to previous starter turned backup Jackson. The Vikings had quite the scare for the majority of the game as the Lions led them. But never fear, it's the Lions. They can't possibly win a game this season and they keep continuing to prove that. They're on their way to 0-16 stardom!

Bengals @ Colts - The Colts finally have a blow out! Peyton had one of those games, we've come to expect from him over the years (unlike most games this season). 26/32, 277 yds, 3TDs. The Colts defense sacked Fitzpatrick 5 times and held the Bengals to only 3 pts. This win keeps the Colts at the top of the wild card spot.

Eagles @ Giants - So my theory is after Plax told his (most likely soon-to-be-former) teammates, "Win this one for me," they all thought to themselves, "HAHAHAHA!! Yeah right!" And then proceeded to give the game to the Eagles. Anyone care to argue?

Browns @ Titans - I would like you all to refer to this post. What would the Cleveland Browns do without Phil Dawson? He's their only source of points. Don't forget to get your Pro-Bowl vote in for him! Despite having 131 penalty yds and 3 turnovers, the Titans won this one easily and clinched the AFC South.

Falcons @ Saints - The NFC South is all about the home team. The NFC South is collectively 23-2 when playing at home. So please tell me why so many people picked the Falcons? In a back and forth offensive shoot-out, both teams put up 414 yds and it came down to the final 2 mins for the Saints to take the lead and win the game. But 23-2, man the NFC South is serious about no one messing with their house!

Texans @ Packers - I love seeing guys who are warm climate players without sleeves at Lambeau. Matt Schaub came back after a 4 game hiatus (with sleeves...hint hint Tony Romo you're an idiot) and showed the Packers defense he meant business passing for 414 yds and 2 TDs. And despite having 4 turnovers, the Texans won a cold one in Green Bay - no sleeves and all.

Dolphins @ Bills - This was supposed to be a Bills home game. So why were there so many Fins fans? Easy; Welcome to Canada, leave your tailgating supplies and Bills jerseys at the border. In a lack lustre game, the Dolphins came out on top to join the 3-way tie of the AFC East.

Jets @ 49ers - Hi we're the 49ers, we can only beat teams from the AFC East because it screws up their hunt for the division title. Miami, you're next ;)

Patriots @ Seahawks - I became prematurely excited to see the Patriots trailing for most of the game. Although, perhaps the Seahawks should bump Wallace up to starter and telling Hasselbeck to enjoy the bench. They've really got nothing to lose.

Chiefs @ Broncos - After trailing at half time, the Broncos realized how incredibly embarrassing a loss to the Chiefs at home would be. After losing 3 in a row at home, the Broncos stepped up and beat the Chiefs 24-17. Although they'll make the playoffs with a divisional title, don't expect the Broncos and their inconsistency to win a playoff game.

Cardinals @ Rams - Oooo!! An exciting NFC West matchup! Ok sorry sometimes I ooze sarcasm just too much. Um the Cardinals clinched the west with a dominating record of 8-5!!!!! Gross.

Cowboys @ Steelers - Hi my name's Tony Romo. I was born in Wisconsin. Do you know what that means? I'm too much of a man for sleeves! Well Tony, you're a moron. In one of the strangest offensive battles I've seen, the Cowboys decided that handing the game over with 1:40 left seemed like the best idea. Also, once again Big Ben's o-line went ahead and showed their disdain for him. At one point, Big Ben's back was just grass. With the Cowboys' loss, the Giants clinched the NFC East.

Redskins @ Ravens - Joe Flacco and his flock of Ravens want it. They want it so bad. Ed Reed became a household name after his performance last night. The Ravens' D held Portis only 32 yds and got 2 INTs off of QB Jason Campbell. With this win, the Ravens remain one game behind the Steelers in the North and in line for a wild card spot.

Tonight we've got Bucs @ Panthers, the NFC South goes to 24-2 at home after this game giving the Panthers a one week lead of the division. Don't worry Bucs fans, it's only a week.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Just hand over your wallet Toronto

The first regular season NFL game in Canada will be played today in Toronto at the Skydome...err I mean Rogers Centre (ah eff it it's still the Skydome in everyone's mind). So I already made my views on the London games known. So now what's wrong with the Toronto series. Oh man where do I begin?

Well first of all, for any Toronto football fans to go to the game they've got to open their wallets and actually you know what just hand their entire wallet over. The average ticket price at the Skydome errr Rogers Centre is $183 CAD (about $144USD). Average ticket price at Ralph Wilson? $51.24USD. (Source: National Post)

Next problem - the closed dome! The Bills should never play a "home" game indoors. That's not Bills football. Bills fans wanted the dome open. So of course, the dome is closed. The elements are part of the game. I've been to an indoor game there. I saw last season's International Bowl there. It's not the same. The atmosphere is just not the same at all.

3rd problem - Back to the money factor. So it's almost $100 more to see a game in Toronto than in Buffalo. Now Toronto is only about 2 hours out of Buffalo. According to Mapquest, it's about $10 in gas if your car gets about 25 MPG. So now let's say it's you and your buddy going to the game:
  • 2 tickets for Dolphins/Bills in Toronto = $288USD

  • 2 tickets for a game in Buffalo = $102USD

  • Gas to Buffalo from Toronto (return) = $20USD

  • Tolls/border crossing = $5USD

  • Parking in Buffalo = $15USD

  • Parking in Toronto = $15USD

  • Total for Toronto game for 2 people = $303USD

  • Total for Buffalo game for 2 people = $142USD

That's a difference of $161!! That's ridiculous!

Next up - tailgating. Good luck with that in Toronto. Just another way Toronto will kill the atmosphere surrounding Bills football. How many tickets and arrests will happen today? Welcome to Canada; leave your beer at home :(

Next - (oh I can keep going and going) - the CFL. I'm not a CFL fan at all. But Mike Vanderjagt and the Toronto Argos can't be too impressed with this.

Ok I'll stop but seriously keep the Bills in Buffalo. Please!

Friday, December 5, 2008

Oh O.J.

Looks like O.J. is finally going away. 61 year old Simpson is going to jail for minimum 9 years and as much as 33 years. Looks like karma finally came back to bite him in the ass (might not be the only thing). Ok sorry I had to; it was just too easy!
Don't even need to photoshop a picture for this one. That smug look is good enough!

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Has the ball gotten heavier??

The NFL suspended 6 players for using a diuretic, which works as a masking agent for steroids. This list includes the Vikings' defensive tackles Kevin and Pat Williams, and Saints' Deuce McAllister, Charles Grant, and Will Smith. In addition to the previous 5, the Texans' long snapper Bryan Pittman was also suspended. I guess the football has just gotten too heavy to snap for Mr. Pittman. I mean it must be so heavy to snap that ball 10ish yards.
Honestly though, I'm glad the NFL is cracking down on doping violators. Don't want another baseball issue.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Playoff predictions

Yeah Coach...I want to talk about playoffs!

Let's start with the NFC. Currently the playoff picture for the NFC has the Giants, the Vikings, the Bucs, and the Cardinals as the division leaders with the Panthers, Falcons, Cowboys, and Redskins in the wild card race.

NFC East - The Giants have a tough schedule remaining but I don't think tough enough to knock them out. They have a 3 game lead over the Cowboys. The only way the Cowboys could overthrow the Giants is if the Giants lose their remaining games and the Cowboys win out the season. Not seeing that happen, seeing as the Cowboys remaining schedule includes @Steelers, Giants and Ravens at home, and @Eagles. I think the Cowboys will finish 10-6 at best. Prediction: New York Giants

NFC North - I think the Lions are going to take this division with flying colours. Haha ok kidding! The Vikings are sitting atop the NFC North right now at 7-5, but the Bears are 6-6, and the Packers are 5-7. Any of these teams could win the division. The Vikings play the Lions next then visit the Cardinals, then back home for the Falcons and Giants. So at worse, the Vikings end up 8-8. The Bears have 3 home games against the Jaguars, the Saints, and the Packers, then visit the Texans, which will probably put the Bears at 8-8. The Packers host the Texans, then are on the road to play the Jaguars, and the Bears, then have the Lions at home. The Packers could easily win out their season, leaving them at 9-7. So I'm either giving this to the Packers or the Vikings if they can pull out a win against the Cards, or maybe the Giants for the last game of the season since that game would probably be meaningless to the G-men. Prediction: Minnesota Vikings

NFC South - This is the toughest division in the NFC to decide on. The Bucs are tied with the Panthers at 9-3, but have already won their first matchup. The Falcons are just one game behind them at 8-4. The Bucs play guest to the Panthers next Monday night, then visit the Falcons, then are home to play the Chargers and the Raiders. The Bucs have already beat both the Panthers and the Falcons, and the Chargers and the Raiders shouldn't be a problem so the worst they finish is 11-5, but I'm feeling a 12-4 out of them with a loss to the Panthers who are undefeated at home. The Panthers play the Bucs (as just mentioned) and the Broncos at home, then on the road to play the Giants and Saints. So they finish out 11-5 and take a wild card. The Falcons play the Saints, the Bucs, the Vikings, and the Rams. Depending on the outcome at the Superdome, the Falcons finish either 11-5 or 10-6. Prediction: Tampa Bay Buccaneers

NFC West - I'm not wasting my time. Prediction: Arizona Cardinals

Wild card - We haven't talked about the Redskins yet. They're currently 7-5 and have 2 hard games left (Ravens and Eagles) and 2 gimmes (Bengals and 49ers). So I'm putting them at 9-5 which makes them miss the playoffs since the Panthers should be 11-5, the Falcons 11-5 or 10-6, and the Cowboys 10-6. So who gets it if the Falcons and Cowboys both finish 10-6? Well they haven't played each other so it would turn into record against common opponents. That would give it to Dallas. Prediction: Carolina Panthers and Dallas Cowboys (if I gave it to the Falcons, I'd get the cold shoulder from Dave so this is his influence)

AFC time. Division leaders as of right now: Jets, Steelers, Titans, and Broncos. Wild card hunt: Colts, Ravens, Patriots, and Dolphins.

AFC East - Oh God. Well the Bills are out because there's no way they'll win the rest of their season with Losman. So scratch that one out. So the Jets have the division right now at 8-4 with both the Pats and the Fins nipping at their heels at 7-5. The Jets have a trip to play the 49ers, home to the Bills, @Seahawks, and finish up at home against the Dolphins. As much as this pains me to say, they could easily win out the season. They might lose to the Dolphins. So I'm going to put them at 11-5. Patriots play @Seahawks, @Raiders, Cardinals, and @Bills. Easy 3 wins there. So they'll finish 10-6. Dolphins play @Bills (well in Toronto), 49ers, @Chiefs, and @Jets. So by week 17 they potentially could be 10-5, with the Jets 11-4. If this is the case, Jets win and go 12-4. If the Dolphins lose a game before this and come in at 9-6, the final game of the season won't matter and to the Jets and the Dolphins win finishing 10-6. So either way Fins go 10-6. Prediction: New York Jets

AFC North - Steelers or Ravens? Steelers are currently 9-3. They've got Cowboys, @Ravens, @Titans, and Browns. I think they beat the Cowboys and definitely Phil Dawson aka the Browns. But the Ravens and Titans on the road could be hard, but they already beat the Ravens once this year. So let's say they finish 12-4. Where's that going to put the Ravens? They're 8-4. They've got Redskins, Steelers, @Cowboys, and Jaguars. Let's say they win 2 of those (Redskins and Jaguars) putting them at 10-6. Prediction: Pittsburgh Steelers

AFC South - Titans currently have a 3 game lead over the Colts. Titans have Browns, @Texans, Steelers, and @Colts. They win their next 3 and then lose to the Colts (no this is not wishful thinking) at Lucas Oil finishing 14-2 and taking the division. Prediction: Tennessee Titans (I can't believe I just said that; it hurt a little)

AFC West - What’s with the West divisions? They’re terrible in both conferences. Prediction: Denver Broncos

Wild card - Colts have an easy schedule left minus one; Bengals, Lions, @Jaguars, and Titans. They can easily win the rest of the season and finished 12-4, which would give them the top wild card spot. Now’s the tricky part: Who gets the second wild card? According to my thoughts, the Patriots, Dolphins, and Ravens are tied at 10-6. Frankly, that’s too much tie-breaking for me to do right now. So I’m picking randomly. Prediction: Indianapolis Colts and Baltimore Ravens

Monday, December 1, 2008

Week 13 Recap

This week's recap might be a little rough seeing as I'm going 100% off of highlights since the only game I saw this Sunday was the Colts/Browns game. So if I miss anything, please fill me in!

Titans @ Lions - The Lions are so terrible this year that I'm actually starting to feel for them. They only got 154 offensive yds in this matchup against one of the best teams in the NFL. After losing last week to the Jets, the Titans wanted to remind everyone that they still are a force to be reckoned with.

Seahawks @ Cowboys - Another terrible team vs. good team blowout. The Cowboys suffered some injuries to big players though during this one. Ware and Barber both left the game. Both are listed as day to day now. The Seahawks need to do some big restructuring seeing as this is the first time they've lost 10 games in 8 seasons.

Cardinals @ Eagles - Ok Donovan, I'm sorry. Happy now? I said it. I'm sorry. The Eagles dominated this game and my fantasy team LOVED it! Westbrook got 2 receiving TDs and 2 rushing TDs. Thank you!! Just a thought for the Cards though - maybe you should stop playing on Thanksgiving. You've lost the last 8 games you've played on Thanksgiving. Too much tryptophan perhaps?

49ers @ Bills - Please see this post about the Bills. All I've heard about this game was that it was only mildly better than the Colts game. Trent Edwards left the game with a strained groin. Once J.P. Losman is your QB, you know you've just got another loss, man. (Ok that was bad). The Bills can kiss any playoff hopes bye-bye.

Ravens @ Bengals - The Ravens continue to play well, not that they had much of an opponent, but I'll still give them props. WR Mark Clayton threw a TD, everyone is lovin' the wildcat formation this season.

Saints @ Bucs - With the Saints loss on Sunday, I think their playoff hopes are done. The Saints need to establish a running game seeing as relying on Drew Brees just doesn't work. The 3 INTs were the losing factor in this one.

Giants @ Redskins - As much as I thought it would affect the Giants, Plax's drama seemed to be completely out of the Giants' minds. The Giants have one thing on their minds and that's winning. And they are definitely winning. With the loss, the Redskins fall one game behind the Cowboys now, which could be a big factor for the wild card race.

Dolphins @ Rams - If Phil Dawson played for the Rams...haha ok I'll stop with the Phil Dawson stuff. In the battle of the field goals, the Dolphins managed to get a TD to put them ahead and still in the playoff race. And well the Rams, there's always next year.

Colts @ Browns - The rain made it impossible for either offense to get anything going. Addai fumbled the first play of the game. Peyton only threw 125 yds. LB Gary Brackett left the game with an ankle injury, leaving the Colts defense missing two stars since Bob Sanders didn't start. Both kickers missed field goals. Derek Anderson left the game with a sprained MCL and will miss the rest of the season. Ken Dorsey is now the starter in Cleveland and I've just learned that if he gets injured return specialist Joshua Cribbs will play QB. I actually feel bad for Browns fans now.

Panthers @ Packers - Panthers' RB Williams ran in 4 TDs in this back and forth battle. Despite controlling the ball for 15 mins longer, the Packers drop this one to the Panthers and look like their playoff hopes are over at 5-7.

Falcons @ Chargers - I love how at the beginning of the season the Chargers were supposed to be one of the best in the AFC. They're now 4-8. And the Falcons are 8-4. LT continues to disappoint this season with only 24 yds.

Broncos @ Jets - Yes!!! Brett Favre sucks again!! Muhahaha! Also, for the life of me, I cannot figure the Broncos out. Both teams still lead their divisions. For the Jets, that's an accomplishment in the AFC East where every team is at least 500. For the Broncos, that just means they're the best in a group of losers.

Steelers @ Patriots - I love this picture. The Pats had 5 turnovers and Matt Cassel did not have 400 yds. Yay!

Chiefs @ Raiders - Apparently, the Chiefs won. Apparently, no one cares.
Bears @ Vikings - The Vikings took the top spot in the AFC North, which had been tied up for a while, with this win. The Vikings defense got to the Bears offense, which had to depend on rookie RB Matt Forte since QB Orton was too busy throwing INTs.
Jaguars @ Texans - Currently, it's 13-3 Texans.

Phil Dawson IS the Cleveland Browns

After my weekend in Cleveland, I realized something. Cleveland Brown fans LOVE Phil Dawson. I've never seen so much love and praise for a kicker. Then, I realized something else. He's their only source of offense so of course they love him. 95 of their 213 points scored have been from him. And now that Anderson's out; Ken Dorsey is the Browns' QB so we know there's not going to be anymore passing TDs in Cleveland...I'm going to go out on a limb and say that Dawson is the 4th string QB. Crennel's got to be thinking, "Hey Phil scores all our points anyways he might as well do it all!"

Next - Cleveland Browns fans: I'm really disappointed in every last one of you. I was decked out in a ton of Colts gear and not one of you chirped me or even attempted to boo me. The Browns were leading most of the game. No one said a word. So Cleveland, your fans aren't as rowdy as they were made out to be. I'm kinda upset. I was all fired up for some good ol' fashioned football chirpin'!

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Kiss kiss bang bang

Oh Plax!! Seriously?? You shot yourself??? Seriously? Wow! I can't even write anything wittier than that because you shot yourself...Priceless. Have fun on the sidelines because you shot yourself!

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Happy Thanksgiving!!

All day football! I know you're excited! I heard a good joke this morning and felt the need to share it with everyone as a Thanksgiving treat.

Hey did you hear about the Lions having to suspend practice yesterday? One of the players found a white powder on the field, and alerted Marinelli so he suspended practice and called in the cops and federal agents. Michigan state police forensic analysts came in and had a look at it and determine it to be the goal line. Oh Detroit!

Happy Thanksgiving Americans! Enjoy your turkey and football :)

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Fighting back Barbie tears...

*Sigh* Brady Quinn's season is done five days before my buddy and I road trip to Cleveland to see our beloved Colts kick some Browns butt. I'm not going to lie though. Brady, this is heartbreaking. I've gotten girls into football based on the shirtless pictures you have on the internet. Whatever works, right? Anyways, now you've gone and ruined that. One thing though, at least I know this game's a gimme with Derek Anderson quarterbacking. So in some ways, I thank you Brady for getting injured in your second career start. In others, I wish you'd just learn to throw with your left hand. That index finger doesn't look broken. You can do it!
My apologies to all the boys who just had to read that. I'm sure when Tom Brady got injured all the female football bloggers who have no taste in men cried about it too.

Rodgers catching a case of the Favres?

After last night's game, I'm convinced Aaron Rodgers used to say, "When I grow up, I want to be just like Brett Favre!"

Well Mr. Rodgers congratulations. After last night's performance you are the new Brett Favre. You might as well stick a number 4 on your jersey. 248 yds 2 TDs and here it comes 3 INTs. My poor fantasy team almost came back from being down 93-46 going into last night's game. I got up to 93-93 and tied it up and then do you know what happened? That's right Rodgers threw his 3 INT of the night and I lost 93-92. No I'm not bitter at all.

Now the game wasn't entirely your fault, Aaron. Your defense thought staying in Green Bay would be a way better idea than showing up in New Orleans. 51 guys gave up 51 points!!! Who do you think you are? Texas Tech? 7 TDs and a FG. Man! Keyshawn's totally putting you guys in the next C'mon Man segment.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Week 12 Already???

It's week 12 already! This season is zoomin' by! Anyways you know the drill.

Bengals @ Steelers - Big Ben didn't get sacked!!! Aww Benny your O-line doesn't hate you as much as we all thought. The Bengals really are brutal though. I don't know what else to say. The AFC North is going to be interesting down the stretch with the Steelers and the Ravens.

Eagles @ Ravens - In the battle of the birds, the Ravens pecked the Eagles to death. Andy Reid pulled McNabb out at half time (see post below) due to lack of productivity and put in Kevin Kolb who equally sucked. High five Coach! Good call! The Ravens took this one to improve to 7-4 and put them one game behind the Steelers for the AFC North.

Texans @ Browns- Oh wow. In a game of who sucks a little bit less, the Texans came out with the W. The Browns had 5 turnovers in the game. Romeo Crennel pulled Quinn and put in Anderson in the 3rd only to have the same results the Eagles saw from benching McNabb. Although I'm sure Brady was probably thinking "Hmmm I heard McNabb got benched too I wonder if I can scoop up his Chunky deal - you can never have enough endorsements!!"
Bucs @ Lions - So I'm watching the Eagles/Ravens game when I look at the Fox score ticker and see 17-0 Lions. Surely this must be a computer glitch! So I grab my laptop and check Yahoo! Sports - same score, I go to - same score. I wonder if the world is ending around me. Then the Bucs woke up and the world corrected itself! Yay! That was a scary moment though.

Bills @ Chiefs - Dear Buffalo, you still make me want to gag. But thank you for finally winning after the pathetic performances you've been putting out lately. Just one thing you should be aware of - the Chiefs only had the ball for 24 mins and in those 24 mins they put up over 400 offensive yards and that's after having 5 turnovers. That should never happen. Just an FYI that's all. Oh yeah and love, Barbie ;)

Bears @ Rams - So the guy I was playing this week had Chicago's D for fantasy. FML! (If you don't know what that means - check urban dictionary). Forte ran all over St. Louis. Rams QB Bulger left the game after a hit to the head and Trent Green (yeah that's right he's still around apparently) came in only to throw 4 INTs! Clearly went to the Brett Favre School of Quarterbacking! But hey the Rams at least scored a FG! Way to go guys! We're all so proud.

Jets @ Titans - Yeah bitches!!! It happened! Someone finally beat the Titans. Unfortunately, it was the Jets but the '72 Dolphins thank you. The Titans didn't look like an undefeated team throughout this game though. Sloppy passes accompanied with drops and no running game was ultimately the end of the Titans undefeated season.
Patriots @ Dolphins - Matt Cassel. I want to hate you based on the principle that you are a Patriot but I can't. You spent your entire NCAA career playing backup. Your entire NFL career playing backup and now you're the little backup who could! 2 weeks in a row with 400 passing yard. Shit son! How pumped are you that you're a free agent after this season?? Or better question how pumped is your agent? The Fins kept it close until the 4th when the Pats ran away with this important divisional game.

Vikings @ Jaguars - Vikes' D kicked butt! They beat up on Gerrard sacking him 4 times and held the Jaguars' backs to only 35 yds! The win keeps the Vikings in line for the 3-way tie for 1st or 2-way tie depending on tonight's matchup with the Packers/Saints.
49ers @ Cowboys - So you know how I said the guy I was playing this week for fantasy had Chicago's D...well he also had T.O. (fml again!) T.O. living up to his words that the offense was nothing without him had 213 yds yesterday! In case you were wondering that's 27 fantasy pts in my league...yeah I definitely lost this week haha. The Cowboys are now 7-4 tied with the Redskins and I have a feeling are going to make a good wild card run after a rocky start.
Raiders @ Broncos - Things the Broncos don't like doing: 1. winning at home, 2. winning a divisional game and 3. looking like idiots...No wait they like doing number 3. Fun stat time - the Raiders hadn't scored an offensive TD in 15 quarters; they scored 3 in one half yesterday. The Broncos still hold onto the division at 6-5 with a 2 game lead over the Chargers who lost last night.
Panthers @ Falcons - The shootout of the south! One good thing about fantasy this week - the guy I was playing against didn't have Michael Turner!! The Falcons got 4 TDs from their RB. The Panthers loss leaves them tied with the Bucs for the division with the baby Falcons nipping one game behind.
Giants @ Cardinals - Who is this version of Eli Manning and where did he come from? Baby Manning has come a long way in 5 seasons with the Giants. Justin Tuck continued with his sacking. And overall I think it's time to finally say it...*sigh* here we go "TheGiantsarethebestteamintheNFC" Or if you ask Tyler, the NFL.
Redskins @ Seahawks - Welcome back Jim Zorn! The former Seahawk QB turned Redskins head coach snuck away with a victory in Seattle. Portis ran all over Seattle's D with 143 yds, despite a banged up knee. The win keeps the Redskins in line with the Cowboys for a serious wild card threat.
Colts @ Chargers - I think my heart stopped beating at least 3 or 4 times during this game. The Colts always have trouble with the Chargers and as soon as Peyton threw his first pick, I had flashbacks of last year's 6 INTs and missed field goal. But, the Colts and their horseshoes managed to pull this one out. Vinatieri kicked a 51-yd as the clock expired to win this one and keep the Colts in wild card contention!
Tonight we've got Packers @ Saints - I've got the Packers - only because my only chance of winning fantasy this week is if Rodgers throws about 300 yds and 4 TDs to Jennings. So Packers 34-27.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

McNabb on the bench

Donovan McNabb got benched at half time today for lack of productivity. Here's a list of things he was probably doing during the 2nd half:

1. Reading the NFL rule book - Wow guys games really can end in a tie. That's AMAZING!
2. Texting Romo to see how well he gets along with T.O. - 213 yds? Really that well??
3. Telling Andy Reid he hopes they can continue their man-love which is equivalent to Madden/Favre.
4. Writing an "I'm sorry" letter to T.O.
5. Eating Chunky in hopes he can keep his deal with Campbell's because Momma McNabb will be angry otherwise.
6. Wondering if the Ti-Cats need a QB since his wife's already in Hamilton.
7. Learning to play hockey - since the NHL has no ties.
8. Looking at a Rogaine pamphlet to reverse the obvious balding.
9. Applying for a position in Obama's administration.
10. Wondering if he should take down his fathead of Andy Reid he has above his bed.
11. Calling his travel agent - Hi I'd like to book a trip to somewhere warm on Dec. 29th. No no don't be silly there won't be a post-season for me.
12. Creating a Facebook event for Pacman's return - C'mon Pacman I know you wanna party!
13. Thinking "Ha ha Kolb's so cold with his bare arms and look at me looking like a little baby all bundled up in my coat!"
14. Checkin' out time shares in a Florida retirement community
15. Wondering how many licks it takes to get to the centre of a Tootsie Pop.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Peyton's priceless

I love this new Mastercard commercial starring Peyton Manning.

Tony the role model

So the other day Tony Romo paid for a homeless guy's ticket to go to the movies. I guess anybody's presence is better than Jessica's. They went to see Role Models. Maybe that's why Tony was orginally going alone. He'd miss half the movie trying to explain the jokes to his girlfriend. But good on ya Tony. I guess you're sympathetic since you know if you break your pinky again you'll be in that guy's shoes.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

The Bills make me want to ...gag

Sorry Buffalo but seriously you don't make me want to shout. You don't make me want to sing old songs and replace words with the Bills. You make me want to scream honestly. You started the season so promising and now you're at 5-5 and basically out of the wild card race. I still feel the urge to chalk it up to you don't want to be in Buffalo (totally understandable, but suck it up and deal with it). Win some games. Remember how good it felt the first half of the season. I don't get how you can start the season 5-1 and then drop 4 in a row. You've got 2 easy games coming up and then a hard last 4 weeks. Win the next 2; get your confidence back up and then stop sucking!

Monday, November 17, 2008

Week 11 Recap

Week 11 here we go.

Jets @ Patriots - So I think Brett Favre read my blog hating on him because he played a perfect game. Thanks Brett making me look like an idiot. I'm going to write it off as blondeness and still continue my dislike for you. Cassel is really starting to come into his own. He threw 400 yards and 3 TDs. But the Jets took the game and the division in OT. For an NFL overtime rant you should check Dave's Football Blog

Broncos @ Falcons - Despite having the ball for about 7 minutes more, the Falcons fell short to the Broncos. The Broncos seem to have gotten a grasp of things again and look poised to take the AFC West seeing as they're the only team with a winning record in that division. The Falcons have a tough schedule for the rest of the season with the exception of the Rams might be a hard for them to grab a wild card spot but maybe.

Lions @ Panthers - I'm going to say it: 0-16. It's just not going to happen for the Lions. I'm sorry guys but the rest of your schedule is hard and you can't win. I'd love to see you prove me wrong but you are worse than last year's Dolphins. Panthers and Bucs have a good run going for the division. Whoever doesn't win the division has got a wild card spot.

Eagles @ Bengals - A tie is worse than kissing your sister, so Donovan pucker up! This just had pathetic written all over it. But it just goes back to my point about the kicker being the hero or the zero. Graham missed a 47-yd attempt wide-right with 8 seconds left in OT to leave the game at 13 all. One other thing - yes Donovan, games CAN end in

Saints @ Chiefs - Not a shocking game. Other than Tyler Thigpen doesn't suck that bad. Larry Johnson returned this week to do not much. Saints won - duh. Moving on to less crappy match ups.

Ravens @ Giants - Can the Giants repeat? Seriously? To me last year was a total fluke. But this year, the Giants actually look good. Joe Flacco apparently missed his calling though. He ran for 7 less yards than all 4 RBs for the Ravens. Flacco - 57 yds; 4 guys in total - 64 yds. Uh huh...

Vikings @ Bucs - Defense wins games right? Well in this one it certainly did. Frerotte was sacked 5 times. The Vikes could have used the win seeing as their division is all tied up at 5-5 well and then there's the 0-10 Lions. The Vikes have a moderately tough schedule left so who knows what happens to them. And like I said Bucs make the playoffs one way or another.

Raiders @ Dolphins - Way to go Miami. You barely beat the Raiders. High five!!

Packers @ Bears - The Packers destroyed the Bears in this one to the point that Fox switched off the game for lack of competitiveness. They held onto the ball almost 15 mins longer than the Bears. That's a whole quarter! Urlacher finally did something after being pretty much useless this season. An INT but when your offense can't do anything with the ball it doesn't even matter.

Texans @ Colts - My boys pulled it out. Peyton is back!!!! He's thrown 7 TDs in the last 3 games with no INTs. The division is obviously out of reach with the perfect Titans, but the Colts are sitting at 6-4 with a fairly easy schedule coming up. Only one of the 6 teams the Colts have left to play have winning records - unfortunately it's the Titans. But last season, the Colts lost to the Titans giving them a wild card spot on week 17. Maybe history will repeat itself in the other direction.

Rams @ 49ers - Simply put - the Rams suck. The 9ers scored 28 points in the 2nd quarter alone! That's all I can say because in reality both teams suck.

Cardinals @ Seahawks - So um yeah the Seahawks suck too. You turn the ball over 4 times you know you can't win it. Hey Kurt Warner, have fun in the playoffs.

Titans @ Jaguars - Blah the Titans win again. I don't like writing this. So yeah moving on...

Chargers @ Steelers - This game was so boring to watch honestly. But the Steelers pulled it out despite 115 penalty yds. They owned the ball 14 mins longer. The Steelers offense was productive in every way other than crossing the goal line. The final play drama caused an uproar in Vegas but the game would have had the same victor either way.

Cowboys @ Redskins - Romo came back with his pinky in a cast. Portis started despite the sprained MCL (ouch). But the Boys took this one to keep their playoff hopes alive.

Tonight we've got Browns @ Bills - can the Bills stop their losing streak? I'm going to say yes since the Browns aren't in their division and they know how to win games against non-AFC East teams. Although I'd like a Browns win in this one. My prediction 23-17 Bills.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Girls' guide part 3 - McDefense

Well ladies, I'm going to use Grey's Anatomy for the defense since I've exhausted Sex & the City.

Defensive positions
Defensive Line (DL) - The DL is like Bailey. There are 4 defensive linemen (different positions). The defensive lineman is similar to the offensive line. They line up at the line of scrimmage opposite from the offensive linemen. Their job is to penetrate the offensive line to get to prevent the offense from having a successful play. So the Bailey comparison, defensive linemen have bigger builds, are quick, and have stamina. Bailey is always the quickest one to the scene in an emergency and always the one to break up the fights over patients and cases (like breaking up an offensive play). Real life defensive lineman you'd know - Jason Taylor; how you know him - he's another Dancing with the Stars boys.

Linebacker (LB) - The LB is like the Chief. A linebacker lines up right behind the defensive line. There are 3 LBs on the defense. Each have different roles - cover the tight end or running back on pass plays, stop the run, and blitz (i'll explain that later). The LB is responsible for calling the plays. They're like the leader of the defense. The Chief is the leader of the hospital. He's responsible for calling all the shots of what happens. Real life LB you'd know - Ray Lewis; how you know him - he's in the Under Armour commercials

Defensive back (DB) - Think of the 4 defensive backs as Meredith, Christina, Izzie, and Alex. They intercept the best cases from the competition. There are 2 different DBs: cornerbacks (CB) and safeties (S). Their main purpose is to protect the backfield and prevent the offense from completing longer passes and tackling offensive players who get to the backfield. CBs cover the WRs and try to intercept the ball hence the comparison to the 4 characters. Real life S you'd know - Troy Polamalu; how you'd know him - watch the video!

Friday, November 14, 2008

Girls' guide Part 2 - Sex & the Stadium

There's lots of different positions in football and every girl knows Sex & the City. So it only makes sense to use the characters of Sex & the City as my main reference here. I'll use other pop culture references too but you'll get it!

Offensive positions
Quarterback (QB) - This position is like Carrie. There'd be no show without her. The QB's job is to basically be the leader of the offensive. They have control of the ball. Much like how Carrie controls the show because episodes are generally based on whatever she's writing about. The QB can throw the ball, hand it off, or run with it in order to gain yards. Real life QB you'd know - Tony Romo; how you know him - he's Jessica Simpson's boyfriend.

Wide receiver (WR) - This position is like Samantha. The wide receiver is meant to catch passes from the QB. Samantha is a self-proclaimed receiver. Also, WRs often like to go for the deep ball (a pass far down the field). Samantha also likes to go de...ok you get the picture. WRs tend to be the primadonna of the team as well for some reason. Everything has to be all about them, which is very Samantha-like. Real life WR you'd know - Jerry Rice (he's retired though); how you know him - he danced with the stars.

Running back (RB) - This position is like Charlotte really only because she runs. RBs are the runners on the team. When they are involved in a play, the QB will either hand them the ball or throw a short pass to them. Real life RB you'd know - O.J. Simpson (retired); how you know him - ...moving on

Tight end (TE) - I know you're all thinking this position is like Smith because of the name but there's more to the TE than a...tight end... The TE has 2 main functions: receiving and blocking. So in reality, I guess the Smith comparison works. He gets the spotlight when he's receiving all the attention (like catching the ball), but he also would do anything for Samantha and help her with anything (like blocking the defenders for the WR or RB to make a play) Real life TE you'd know - Mike Ditka (retired); how you know him - he was in Kicking and Screaming with Will Ferrell

Offensive line (OL) - The offense line consists of different positions but we'll just group them together for simplicity right now. These guys are like Miranda. Their build is Miranda when she's pregnant. Their job is to protect the QB by blocking defenders. Miranda is always known for protecting and being there for Carrie (the QB). They line up at the line of scrimmage (where the ball is placed). In other terms, they are the bodyguards. Real life lineman you'd know - John Madden (retired); how you know him - Frank Caliendo impersonates him (really well). He was also in Little Giants.

Kicker (K) - The kicker is like Big. He either is the most loved or most hated guy on the show, much like a kicker to a team. When a kicker makes a field goal, he's loved. So when Big does something sweet and amazing for Carrie (like the last episode of the series in Paris), he's loved. When a kicker misses a field goal and the team loses, it's left on his shoulders. So when Big screws things up (i.e. marries Natasha), everyone hates him. Real life kicker you'd know - Jay Feely; how you know him - Dane Cook made fun of him on an SNL skit.

Next part we'll do defensive positions!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

The girls' guide to football - Part 1

So one of my biggest pet peeves is the question: What are those big yellow pole thingies? So to all the girls out there, follow this series on understanding football so you don't have to ask those embarrassing questions. I've edited this to include girl analogies.

Ok so, there's 32 teams in the NFL split into 2 conferences the NFC and the AFC. Each conference has 4 divisions (East, West, North, South). Each division has 4 teams.

Next game play: A game is 60 mins broken down into 4 quarters. To win a game, you have to score more points than your opponent. The game begins with a coin toss, the winner can kick or receive the ball to begin. When the offense is on the field, they have 4 *downs* (a down is a play) to go 10 yards in order to keep the ball. When the offense gets the ball, it's 1st and 10 (meaning they're on their 1st down and they have 10 yards to). On 4th down, they have to punt (kick the ball to the other team), go for the 1st down (generally not a great idea), or kick a field goal if they are close enough. Field goals is where those big yellow pole thingies come in. The kicker must kick the ball in between the posts to be successful. If he does so, his team is awarded 3 points. Ideally, a drive (a group of plays to move the play down the field) would result in a touchdown.

The ends of the field are called the endzones. The offense's goal is to reach the other team's endzone. Doing so is called a touchdown. A touchdown is worth 6 points plus a 1 or 2 point conversion. After a team scores a touchdown, they can kick a point after attempt (basically kick a field goal worth 1 point) or try to get the ball in the endzone again for 2 points.

Now in girl terms. Getting a touchdown is going to the mall and finding that exact pair of shoes you wanted! Kicking a field goal is going to the mall and finding out they don't have your size in those perfect shoes but you settle for a different pair.

The defense's job is to prevent the offense from scoring points and getting a 1st down (remember that's going 10 yards). Once again girl terms - remember that episode of Friends with Monica and the wedding dress and the girls all fighting over dresses. The defense's job is to get the dress for its offense. Dress being football here. And preventing the other team from successfully purchasing the dress (i.e. scoring points)

Part 2 will be on positions. Check back soon.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

The great debate: Favre vs. Pennington

So who got the better end of this? The Jets or the Dolphins? Everyone knows I'm biased on this one but still. The Jets lead the Dolphins in the standings by 1 game but in the long-run, I'm handing this one to the Dolphins. The Jets benefited in financial ways from the sales of Favre jerseys but he either wins or loses games. He's just not been consistent enough for me. Pennington in my mind has stepped up in Miami as a leader. Favre's always been a leader but he's risky, which for me I'd rather have consistency than a risky guy who's either going to get to the guy in triple coverage or miss and throw it into the hands of one of the 3 defenders. Also, Brett, dude, you're old. I'm sorry. I know Kurt Warner's old too but he also plays in the easiest division in the NFL. I get it you love the game and I respect you for that. But take a note from Kevin Costner and pack it in for love of the game. I know it'll upset John Madden and Joe Buck but they'll get over it.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Week 10 in review

Ok so I'll admit I actually didn't watch much football on Sunday. Could be because of the blah matchups minus a few. Anyways here we go again.

Broncos @ Browns - Ok so I was bummed that Brady Quinn didn't win his first career start but despite losing he had a great debut. Cutler threw for 447 yds (damn boy!). The Broncos 4th quarter comeback won the game and broke their 3 game losing streak keeping them at the top of the AFC West.

Saints @ Falcons - I'm still in awe/shock/random words over the Falcons. This was a must-win for both teams seeing as the NFC South is incredibly close. I'm also in shock over the fact that rookie QB Matt Ryan has only thrown 5 INTs all season. I feel like he should teach Mr. INT himself Brett Favre a few lessons (Yes John Madden, I just went there!). Falcons win this one 34-20.

Titans @ Bears - 9-0...shit! I mean we all knew the Titans had this one in the bag once the Bears announced Grossman as their starting QB but seriously can someone PLEASE beat the Titans?!

Jaguars @ Lions - Could the Lions possibly get any worse? They sign Culpepper and what does he do? Well he simply became a Lion and sucked like the rest of them. Jones-Drew ran all over the Lions D when it came to finding the endzone. 3 TDs for him this game. Maybe the Lions should just forfeit the rest of this season because frankly they look worse than last year's Dolphins.

Ravens @ Texans - The Ravens have an offense that can score???? 41 pts!? Am I missing something or are Matt Ryan and Joe Flacco trying to have a huge run for rookie of the year? At this rate, I'm thinking a Ravens/Falcons Super Bowl could be interesting. Who would have EVER thought that? Oh yeah the Texans still suck. It's all your fault, Sage.

Seahawks @ Dolphins - The Dolphins are out to prove that they aren't the same team as last year. A 3 game winning streak and 1 game out of first place for the division? Pennington is proving he's a great leader for this team's offense and Joey Porter has 12 sacks on this year showing that Miami actually can play defense without what's his name? Oh yeah the Dancing with the Stars guy...the guy who's been useless this year. Oh Jason Taylor you whiney, little brat.

Packers @ Vikings - Another must-win game for both teams. The NFC North is so tight (and so pathetic). Crosby missed a 52-yd FG attempt as time ran out to give the Vikings the victory over the Pack. Also, the Packers gave up 2 safeties. Seriously guys, that's brutal.

Bills @ Patriots - Oh Buffalo, Buffalo, Buffalo. What is going on? You started this season with a bang and now you've dropped 3 games in a row. 3 division games! It's like you guys had an epiphany "OMG! We might make the playoffs! We have to start losing" I understand you probably hate playing in Buffalo and frankly, I don't blame you but you're stuck there, deal with it. Win a divisional game!

Rams @ Jets - 47-3. I really don't know what else to say. The Rams had that momentary burst of non-suckiness and now...47-3? Moving on...

Panthers @ Raiders - Now here's where I'm going to question why the score wasn't 47-3! 16-7 Panthers. Seriously? Delhomme threw 7/27 and 4 INTs. Did he think, "Hey we're only playing the Raiders. I only have to gave aboue 15% today." I mean he was right; they still won. But still!

Colts @ Steelers - As my friend likes to call him Ben Worthlisberger handed the Colts this game. Thanks Benny :)

Chiefs @ Chargers - Oh boy. The Chiefs almost pulled this one out. If Edwards wasn't such a poor coach. Did he think he was playing Monday night or something? Why would you go for 2?!?! Please explain this to me. You tie the game and go to OT and then kick a FG.

Giants @ Eagles - So maybe the Giants aren't as overrated as I (and everyone else) originally thought. They held the ball for 39 mins in this prime time NFC East matchup. I would just like to make one statement though: Next time, let Westbrook run please. He killed my fantasy week!

49ers @ Cardinals - Apparently there was a game last night?! Dear NFL, when making the schedule please explain to me how you thought this would be a great matchup for MNF?? Love, Leah

Thursday, November 6, 2008

The new Brady bunch

Derek Anderson is out! Now Brady Quinn's the man in Cleveland. How is this going to play out? Is Cleveland's offense going to be more productive with this Brady? Also, now that Brady Quinn's butt won't be falling asleep on the bench anymore, maybe he can stop doing so many endorsements since he's going to have less time on his hands.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

The Redskins do it again

Since 1936, the Redskins' last home game before an election has correctly predicted the results of the Presidential election (with the exception of 2004). If they win, the incumbent party stays in power. If they lose, the other party wins. Well the Skins lost Monday night, which meant bad news for John McCain. So now the Redskins are 18-1 at predicting Presidents. Their one incorrect prediction was the 2004 election, where they lost their last home game predicting a Kerry victory but Bush stayed in power. A pretty terrible election for America giving Bush another four years. We've all seen how that turned out. So I guess that was a huge "loss" for the Redskins win-lose record. Funny 18-1 has a familiar ring to it. Didn't someone else finish 18-1 with their only loss a huge one? New England fans - can you remind me? I don't remember!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

MNF where good coaches turn bad

So last week, it was Tony Dungy; this week - Jim Zorn. It seems as though as soon as the 4th quarter comes, you go for it on 4th down no matter the situation. Last week, I thought maybe Hunter Smith broke his leg or died or something. This week, I thought maybe Suisham got cold feet and was too scared to kick a 4th quarter field goal. Or maybe making poor coaching choices is just the new thing for Monday night. Hank should start singing, "Are you ready for some bad calls??" instead of "Are you ready for some football?"

Monday, November 3, 2008

Half-way there - Week 9 in review

Week 9 is half-way through the NFL season and starts to paint the playoff race. Let's recap Sunday's game and see who looks playoff bound and who looks like they're in need of some work.

Jets @ Bills - The Jets won this important divisional matchup leaving the AFC East one of the tightest divisions in the NFL. With the Pats, Bills, and Jets at 5-3 and the Dolphins at 4-4, this division could send any of these teams to the playoffs. Notes on the game: Favre threw his 300th INT making his the only person in NFL history to reach this mark. Way to go buddy!

Lions @ Bears - Oh my. The Lions almost saw their first win of the season. They blew their lead 10 pt lead at the half to drop their 8th game in a row. The Lions just signed Culpepper to a 2 year deal to add to the "Old QB Boys Club" the NFL's got going on right now. Maybe he can help them win a few games but sorry Lions fans, no playoffs this year. Bears have the NFC North lead right now at 5-3 but the Pack and the Vikes are breathing down their necks at 4-4.

Jaguars @ Bengals - In the game of the big, scary felines, the Bengals FINALLY pulled out a W. The Jags almost came back in the 4th scoring 16 points but that wasn't enough. Final score 21-19. Bengals aren't going to the playoffs and if the Jags want to hang in there for a wild card spot, they need to start winning (wow that was such an obvious Madden statement).

Ravens @ Browns - Yawn. Browns could have had this important divisional game as they had the lead until the 4th quarter. Instead they lost leaving them 3rd in the division at 3-5 and the Ravens at 5-3. The Steelers still have to play tonight and are at 5-2. The Steelers should take this division but if the Ravens continue their winning streak they could be wild cards.

Texans @ Vikings - Schaub left the game injured leaving Rosenfels to try to rally the Texans past the Vikes, which he could not. AP ran for 139 yds. The Texans are in the basement of the AFC South. The Vikes are one game behind the Bears for the top spot in the NFC North. The Vikings could take the division but they're got the Bears and the Packers to fight for it and I'm not seeing that happen.

Packers @ Titans - The Titans remain the lone undefeated team in the NFL despite giving up 390 yds to the Packers. Unless something goes drastically wrong, the Titans look like they'll be taking the AFC South title. The Packers are sitting at 4-4 behind the Bears, tied with the Vikings.

Cardinals @ Rams - I'm going to hand the division to the Cardinals now and not even talk about this game.

Bucs @ Chiefs - The Bucs almost got embarrassed huge! Actually having to go to OT against the Chiefs is embarrassing in itself. They're lucky they pulled this one out. The NFC South is a tight race, the Bucs couldn't afford to lose such a gimme. And the Chiefs...well yeah better luck next year boys.

Dolphins @ Broncos - The Dolphins have now won 4 times as many games as they did last year! And the Broncos are on a 3 game losing streak. Luckily for them, they're the only team at 500 in their division so somehow at 4-4 they look playoff bound. Unless the Chargers remember how to play football.

Cowboys @ Giants - Oh Dallas, what is wrong with you? I realize you still have a winning record but you're in the toughest division in the NFL right now. You need to be playing better than that. Romo or no Romo - pull it together! Also, who can stop the G-men?

Falcons @ Raiders - The Raiders suck. The end.

Eagles @ Seahawks - The Seahawks also suck. Eagles are on a 3 game winning streak. Watch out for them in the wild card race with Westbrook back.

Patriots @ Colts - The rivalry of the decade wasn't the same as normal. But the Colts came out with the win and that's all that matters in my world. Bob Sanders returned after missing 5 games and intercepted Cassel, which pretty much secured the victory for the Colts. Addai also returned after missing a couple weeks, but not much production from him: 32 yds on 17 attempts.

Tonight's game between the Steelers and Redskins should be a good one. Both presidential nominees will be there reminding you to get out and vote tomorrow. I'm going with the Skins 17-14.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

London calling to the imitation zone

Week 8 had the international game. Since then I've heard nothing but complaints. Mike Ditka even put London in the dog house. It's not fair to put the extra strain and jet lag on the players, coaches, and trainers of the two teams involved during the regular season. It is a huge distraction to the season. If the NFL wants to expand to Europe, they should try pre-season games, where the games will have little to no effect on the success of the teams involved. It also affects the fans. New Orleans hometown fans lost the chance to see their team play in New Orleans for one game because the London game was considered a home game for them.

This season Canada will be seeing regular season games. Expansion into Canada is far more feasible than expansion into England. Toronto is only about 2 hours outside of Buffalo. Having the Bills play at the Rogers Centre is a great way to get the league outside of the U.S. without sacrificing the ability of the teams involved to focus on the task at hand - winning games, and continuing to the playoffs. Also, Bills fans can still travel to Toronto for far less cost than Saints fan would have to pay to get to London.

Personally, I think the London games should be changed to pre-season where the outcomes of games are far less important than regular season.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Injuries, suspensions, and fires - oh my

Everyone seems to be injury prone this season! Week 7 saw a lot of talented players leave their games early: RB Reggie Bush, S Roy Williams, S Rodney Harrison (yeah yeah I included him in a list of talented players - that's as nice as I can possibly be to a Pat), QB Jay Cutler, S Troy Palomalu (bad week to be a safety apparently), WR Devin Hester, QB Brodie Croyle (although the Chiefs are hopeless anyway - maybe I should change the list from 'talented injured players' to 'starting injured players').

What's worse than the injuries though is the suspensions! TE Kellen Winslow won't be playing this weekend thanks to comments he made about the Browns. Dude don't hate on your team; that's just too old T.O.-like. WR Matt Jones will be playing on Sunday and will start his 3 game cocaine suspension week 9. CB Adam 'Pacman' Jones is out indefinitely and in rehab now. RB Larry 'I like to beat women' Johnson doesn't have an official suspension yet but he's inactive for week 8 too for obvious reasons.

It seems like Donald Trump has taught a few teams this year his favourite phrase, "You're fired!" Mike Nolan was the latest coach on the chopping block after the 49ers started the season 2-5. The Raiders' Lane Kiffin got the boot after starting 1-3. Interim coach Tom Cable is 1-1 since taking over. The Rams fired Linehan after starting 0-4, since then the Rams under Haslett are 2-0. Is Singletary going to have the same luck? So who's next? Wade Phillips? The Cowboys have lost 3 of the last 4. Not good for a Super Bowl pick. Marvin Lewis? - his 0-7 Bengals are too talented to be winless. Rod Marinelli? - 0-6 Lions are looking pretty pathetic. Brad Childress, Romeo Crennel, Herm Edwards?? Frankly, I think they're all in trouble.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Steven Jackson For Prez

Let's recap another interesting football sunday.

Chargers @ Bills - Well the game started with a power outage. I didn't realize that Ralph Wilson Stadium even had power to begin with. I didn't even bother watching this game because frankly, seeing teams that should be a lot better have losing records is sad. One thing I did watch though was a SD punt batted out of the endzone and pinned at the 1 yd line. That was awesome. So San Diego, c'mon and get it together. And Buffalo - I still haven't figured you out so please send me a letter explaining how you're 5-1 and San Diego is 3-4.

Saints @ Panthers - Not only did the Saints lose this divisional game, but they lost Reggie Bush too. Turnovers lost the game for them (1 interception by Brees and 1 fumble by Shockey in his return from surgery). A special thanks from my fantasty team to the Panthers though for Stewart and Smith each getting a TD. The Panthers are now 5-2 tied with the Bucs for the NFC South lead.

Vikings @ Bears - 89. That's all I can say. 89. The over/under was 38.5. I thought out of any game this week, betting the under was going to be a safe bet. They more than doubled 38.5. The one thing I will mention is the fact that the Vikes had 5 turnovers. 4 INTs thrown by Frerotte. Gus, hunnie, the guys in the orange aren't on your team. Don't throw to them.

Steelers @ Bengals - Cinci held on for the first half. Half time score was 10-7. But the second got out of hand. 38-7 final score on this one. The Steelers defense was all over Fitzpatrick though, sacking him 7 times. Ouch. Chad "Ocho-Sucko" Johnson continues to be a disappointment with only 52 yds this game. Interesting fact - last time the Bengals started 0-7 was 2002 when they only won 2 games all season to finish with the worst record in the NFL that season with 2-14.

Titans @ Chiefs - LenDale White can be Steven Jackon's running mate. 149 yds and 3 TDs. How excited am I that I wasn't playing the guy in my fantasy league that has him AND Jackson as his 2 RBs. The Titans continue to dominate the league starting 6-0 and remain the only undefeated team in the league. The Chiefs continue to fail; there's really not much more to say. Titans have the Monday night game next week against the Colts - could be a the Titans first loss if the Colts who played the Ravens show up and not the Colts who played the Pack.

Ravens @ Dolphins - I have nothing to say about this game. I can't figure out either team. This was a game that most likely had fewer viewers than the Jets @ Raiders. I know I didn't watch it. Actually, I didn't even watch the highlights. So if anyone wants to fill me in, go for it.

49ers @ Giants - Another game I didn't watch. The Giants are good. The 9ers not so much. The only way this game would have made its way to my attention is if it turned out like the Cowboys @ Rams game (or The Steven Jackson Show as I refer to it).

Cowboys @ Rams - Speaking of The S.J. Show! It was 24-7 at half time; so can someone please explain to me why Brad Johnson marched out onto the field in the second half! Romo was dressed and ready to play and even with his broken finger, he probably would have thrown 3 less INTs than Johnson. Apparently all the Rams needed to do to win was get a new coach. They're 2-0 under Haslett and have shown the NFC East that they're not as pathetic as EVERYONE judged them to be. (My apologies to Dave when he reads this and yells at me for even mentioning this game).

Lions @ Texans - Another battle of epic failure. Does anyone care? Even the Lions fans I know don't care and I don't know any Texans fans. Are there any Texans fans? If so, please let me know and also, let me know if you care. Although, I think I already know the answer.

Colts @ Packers - No comment. I thought we were back in business after last week's domination of the Ravens. Apparently not.

Jets @ Raiders - The kickers made this game. With 3 seconds left in regulation, Feely kicked a 52 yd thud. But wait! Cable called a time out right before the kick. Feely gets another shot. This time makes it and we're off to OT. 2:30 left in OT, Janikowski sets up for a 57 yd field goal and makes it to win the game. Janikowski can be named Secretary of State after that one.

Browns @ Redskins - The Redskins came back and redeemed themselves after last week's loss to the Rams. Although it wasn't much of a redemption. The Browns almost came back to tie it with 25 seconds left, but Dawson's missed 54 yd field goal attempt sealed the Skins' victory.

Last but not least Seahawks @ Bucs - I think everyone in Tampa Bay and most likely the rest of the sports world (minus Andrew) was watching a different Tampa game. At one point in the football game, the crowd was cheering "Let's go Rays" this is what makes my theory complete. Congrats to the Rays, AL Champs! If you were wondering though, Bucs won. What a shock! (Sorry Jordan but if the Seahawks suffer anymore injuries, they might as well get a high school team to play for them.)

Tonight's game between the Broncos and Pats. I've got the Broncos. If history repeats itself, that should be the outcome. The Broncs lead the all-time series of this match-up 24-15.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Twin Roys

This is just a quick comment...Dallas now has Roy Williams the safety and Roy Williams the receiver. I'm truly disappointed that they didn't go after Roydell Williams as well to complete the trio. Also, disappointed that both Roys don't play either offense or defense. It'd be great to see them on the field together.

UPDATE (Oct. 20): Roy Williams the safety broke his forearm AGAIN and will miss 6 weeks. They're down to one Roy Williams again.

So um the Giants...

What happened last night? Eli returned to the interception throwing immature qb we usually associate him with. 3 INTs. He only had 1 all season until last night. The Browns came on the field like last year's Browns; not this year's Browns who in the simplest word - suck. Derek Anderson must not enjoy Brady Quinn getting more attention in the media than him through product endorsements and most recently political endorsements - Dear Mr. Quinn, No one cares who you're voting for. You're a back up hunnie - deal with it. Love, Leah. The Browns offense played much more to the standard everyone was expecting this season than they have been. 454 yards destroyed one of the better defenses in the league.

Ok so now the Titans are the best team in the NFL?? The Titans...seriously. The Titans. Wow. I just had to say it one more time to actually believe it. I wonder if Vince Young is still depressed being the only undefeated team in the NFL. I guess I'd be depressed too if my team all of a sudden sky rocketed to #1 while I was told my job was in the hands of Kerry Collins.